Man of Mystery.

"Hello, this is Dave calling from Goliath books to let you know that your order has arrived."

"What?"

"I'm sorry, I'm calling for a Mr. Edwards to confirm arrival of an order that was placed with us."

"I'm her son."

"The details we have quite specifically state that this is for a Mr. Edwards."

"I don't know who that is. What is it?"

"It's a book about wiring regulations."

"Oh yeah! That was me, I ordered that."

"So, you would be Mr. Edwards then?"

"Yeah. Oh great. I'll come in and get that then. Bye."

So, to reiterate, I spent this afternoon talking to someone whose surname was Edwards, was male, and was singularly unaware that others might refer to him as Mr. Edwards.

Sometimes, I cry myself to sleep.